Series:  Forgive as The Lord Forgave You

“As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace.” 1 Peter 4:10

I worked with a fellow believer who was ambitious to a very un-Christian degree. She fiercely positioned herself against me when we first began to work together. Once, she offered to help with my responsibilities, stating she had to stay late to wait for her husband, and had nothing to do. She insisted I let her help me. I was reluctant and didn’t trust her, but it would have been obvious, so against my better judgment, I gave her some things to do for me. Predictably, her boss asked me a few days later why I was “off-loading my responsibilities” onto her. When I explained the situation, he said he wasn’t surprised and warned me about things like this in the future, and things such as this continued. I declared her an enemy (within my mind) and tried to avoid her. I prayed for her, but didn’t want to be her friend; there was too much to risk to get close to her – it seemed too expensive.

I went to Germany for meetings, and she to Italy. We planned to meet in Berlin after working separately in Europe for a few days. I met with the people I went to see and worked late each night in my hotel room; I was tired and lonely when my ambitious co-worker arrived, I gladly accepted an invitation to have dinner together, yet I set boundaries for myself as I knew she couldn’t be trusted. My battle plan was to be nice, have dinner, and get out of there before she started asking about personal things, which I knew she would later use against me.

During dinner, she began to tell about her family when she was growing up. She shared events of her father and the sexual and emotional abuse she endured. I knew what The Lord was doing – He was teaching me why she was the way she was…so I could love her. I didn’t want to love her; I wanted to run from her. As I listened, my heart broke, and I realized the person known for her selfish, ambitious ways was desperately hurting and needed love and healing. Forgiving her became much easier after understanding her past, her emotional deficits, and her pain.

God’s grace is the why; it’s understanding the reason people are the way they are. It’s how God sees us and still loves us, and He knows why we’re the way we are, too. He understands our backstory. Every person has a story and a reason they are the way they are. God has given us a gift of grace and love so we can give that to others, including forgiveness and love.

Ask The Holy Spirit to help you forgive and love; He will.